Tag Archives: shame

You’re made of so much beauty, But it seems that you forgot, When you decided that you were defined, By all the things you’re not.                             ~e.h I have been brewing this idea of photographing my body for a long time. A few weeks shy of my 42nd birthday, I arranged for a “boudoir” photo-shoot, truly an empowering experience to ... Read More »

  It was an unspoken vow. It just sort of happened. I got pregnant, then married, gave birth to a beautiful baby girl, and then we divorced. She was just a toddler. That’s when I married my three-year-old little girl. One of the vows that I made to her when she left my womb was that I would always put ... Read More »

My mother was a virgin when she met my father. I remember her drilling this to anyone who would listen. She was his first virgin. Maybe she was his only virgin. She bore him two children, girls. I am one of them, their eldest.   She was also one of his mistresses. I am the daughter of a mistress. My mother strived to be seen as una “mujer decente”. ... Read More »

For the past twenty-five years I’ve worked on Wall Street, a place that was very foreign to me in my childhood, but one that has been such a big part of who I am as an adult, and one that has driven my mission and work in the Latino community. Unlike many of my colleagues, I didn’t have a formal ... Read More »

In her 1985 one-woman show, Whoopi Goldberg morphed into a child and draped a shirt over her head to stand-in for long, blond hair. That piece of her show was real for me. My sister, Fox, and I used cardigans. Heavier than a blouse, a cardigan stayed in place without fussy re-adjusting, the neck- band shaped itself around our heads, ... Read More »

I’m the first Puerto Rican to have been admitted to the Delaware bar. Sans one Russian woman born in Cuba due to her family’s refugee status, I was the first Latina lawyer in the state of Delaware. That was back in 1980. I had been a lawyer only two years working in Boston when I moved to Delaware to be ... Read More »

I love a cold Jamaican Red Stripe beer or if I am in the mood for a drink, I will order a rum and coke with ice.  I love the art of communication. I enjoy talking to my fellow human beings but I have not mastered the art of articulating my inner emotions. I rely heavily on my favorite vocabulary ... Read More »

I will always remember one of our first family vacations in the late 1990’s with our son, Jordan when he was about a year old. My wife, Norma Jean and I, were thrilled about our planned winter trip to Aruba with our baby boy. Norma and I were domestic partners then, as same-sex marriage wasn’t legal yet in New York. ... Read More »

I met him when I was 21, my heart had been broken for the first time. I was still in love with my ex, but we couldn’t be together. I say this to impart that I wasn’t looking to meet anyone. I was introduced to Jean via my hair stylist who was married to his brother. When we met, he ... Read More »

Shame is the universal companion of women, nipping at our heels, feeding on our deepest fear that who we are is not enough. Shame is beyond annoying. It is debilitating. In order to unpack the shame that is immobilizing us from living our best life and from accessing our true power, we must analyze it like a glass slide under ... Read More »